Dealing with (people who claim to have) depression.

Lets get this out of the way, I'm a diagnosed depressive. I have a sunlamp and a prescription which I never picked up due to a long history of addiction in my family. That's about as far as I'm going to go.

Another thing to get out of the way. People who outwardly proclaim to have depression, don't. I'm talking about that one dickhead who starts a conversation with "I'm so depressed".

Whenever someone proclaims this out loud, slap them around the face, hard and tell them to shut the fuck up because lies make baby Jesus cry. Anyone who is genuinely depressed hates being around people. They want to hide away from the world and be absorbed into the black hole building inside their sanity. They don't want to discuss it, they're ashamed of it, scared to admit it, admit that they have a genuine mental disorder and need help.

Whenever someone claims to have depression within a social context, then I'd be willing to bet they don't, and they just want some attention for being 'dark' and 'broody' (or 'a cunt' and 'faggoty' respectively). I didn't tell my parents for two years, and only because they grew convinced I was going to kill myself. I only told my work after 5 months because it was getting too much and the last shift I had a nervous breakdown.

Also, I didn't follow it with a fucking story about why "I'm so depressed", and you know why? Because depression isn't fucking tangible, it's impossible to explain, it's a void that has no reason of being. You think for hours on end about what could be wrong, to realise you have no problems that are unique to you. You realise that you have no reason to feel this bad, you feel selfish, you hate yourself for being so self absorbed when there is so much tragedy going on in the world.

That's depression, not the fact money is tight, or the boy you like isn't interested in you. Even severe loss isn't depression, it's grief. If your parents died, you wouldn't kill yourself. People watch their children die, they don't kill themselves, they grieve and internalise their pain.

They don't tell everybody loud and proud like they're so different.

So the next time someone claims to be depressed like that? Tell them they make me sick to my stomach, and I sincerely hope that they aren't bluffing.